What do you buy the man who has everything?

You know those fuckers you envy? Or perhaps it's just your dad, or a friend. "What do I get him/her for a birthday gift. He/She has everything!" Do they really have everything?

Stuck here in my apartment, I was bored and watched The Family Man. Nicolas Cage: mid 30's, president of an M&A firm, drives a 575 Maranello, owns 200 Zegna suits in the same fucking color. I want to be THAT guy. That single fucker who can buy whatever he wants. I mean, with a job that I like of course.

Do we NEED everything? My friends always ask me why I don't aspire to be "the guy who has everything." THAT fucker who's got the fast car, wife, family, kids, the whole shebang. Why should I be? I might need a combination of the above, but I don't want it.

If I have it all, what the fuck are my friends going to get me for my birthday??